Skinny Bitch

When it comes to spending money, I'm a tight, uncompromising Republican Scrooge. Only at the food store do I let myself run wild. Everywhere else, I scam. I listen to music on myspace, instead of buying CDs. I gank rolls of toilet paper from the bathrooms at work. When I want to read a book that's not yet available at the library, I go to the bookstore, hole myself up in a corner, and read the hours away.

This past weekend, I sped-read at the Harvard Coop-Fourteen Superfoods and Skinny Bitch. Here's my review of Skinny Bitch.

The premise behind Skinny Bitch is this: Two model-pretty ladies wrote a book about how to get thin. Rather than spew diet schemes, they push getting healthy. They give a lot of the same information as Alex Jamieson does in her book, "The Great American Detox Diet." Only these girls are funny about it.

They call you names. "You don't want to exercise today?" They write. "You're a lazy shit."

"You can't stop eating oreos? You're a fat pig!"

There's the bitch. It was a little too device-y for my tastes. Any truly insecure overweight woman is not going to be stimulated by being called a lazy shit. Still, the book is teeming with information about healthy eating. One read-through, and even I was rethinking my diet.

I've been vegan for over a year now, but I still ate yogurt for the good bacteria. I'd tried soy yogurt before, and hated it.
The Skinny Bitches pointed out that dairy is not only being tainted by the current means of production, but that it's unnatural.

As they put it, we are the only species on the planet that continues to drink breast milk into our adult years. By doing this, we force cows to produce longer than they would naturally. Then there's the facts about what we do to make cows produce longer than naturally. Milk is full of growth hormones, which in turn, play pinball with our hormones. Rarely are these mass produced cows kept in sanitary conditions. Their tits get infected and drip mucus into our milk.

All of this I knew before. But this time, I sucked it up, bought some Wildwood Soyogurt, and loaded it with agave nectar. In about two spoonfuls, I got used to the taste. Now I think I like it even better. Soy yogurt has tons of fiber and protein, calcium, magnesium, potassium, etc; regular has none!

There was one drawback with Skinny Bitch. Their product endorsements made absolutely no sense. They wrote chapters on the evils of refined sugar, and then repped a number of cookie products that contain loads of sugar. They repped companies that use meat and dairy in their foods. Also, like Hungry Girl, these two skinny bitches stress that it's okay to eat junk food, as long as it's natural. I don't buy that at all. Even when natural, sugar is still sugar, and it's still not the best thing for your gut-inside and out. This leads me to believe that the bitchiest thing about these chicks is their metabolisms.

Tomorrow... Fourteen Superfoods! I'll give you a spoiler... it's more like ninety-nine.