MORE Cures?!

When I think of cures, I think of what works in the moment. It's those days when I'm bloated and everything I eat makes me bigger or more explosive. I'm trying to find out: What foods can I eat that solve the problem right away? That's what the last post was all about.

Thank you for contributing YOUR cures! Because IBS is different for everyone, I love hearing about what works for you. It's fascinating to me how our cures converge and diverge!

Some of you suggested tonics. The word tonic is most commonly used in herbal medicine. It's a herbal tincture or infusion taken regularly, a couple times a day, to keep a specific health problem at bay. I see tonics are whatever keeps IBS at bay on a regular basis. For many of us, these include being vegan, not eating cheese, or gluten, etc.

There's a blogpost coming about tonics too!

For now, let's recap your cures!

Eimear suggested bone broth.

I love this suggestion. So often, we go vegan to deal with IBS. This has worked for me and many others, but not everyone. Many of my nutritionist friends have told me that the fat in meat is very helpful because it coats the intestines, making them slippy. One of the problems with psyllium, flax and chia, is that they don't contain enough fat to get things moving. Often, they sit in the gut instead of pushing things forward. This is definitely something to consider, if you are vegan and still feeling IBSsy on a regular basis. Maybe your gut needs more meat fat.

Sarah suggested roasted starchy vegetables and peppermint tea.

There's something about mushy starch that loves on the guts so hard!!!

Heather loves Cream of Rice cereal.

Rice is one of those grains - like oats - that has the ability to neutralize the guts and return them to their regularly scheduled programming. I love it because it works equally well for IBS-C and D. And it's hard to find a food that helps both!


Again - thanks for your input, pals!

Here are a few more of my cures that I forgot!

Soft mushy high fiber foods like...


Eco Planet cereals

This cereal has the texture of hot rice, but with multiple grains. I love it because it gives me the fiber that's missing from rice. For some reason, I can digest it fine when IBSsy.

Tasty Bites

Last fall, the Tasty Biters asked me to review their food. One night, I ate these lentils while horribly IBSsy. Can you imagine my excitement when they helped me feel better?! I can't thank the Biters enough. They found ME. And now, there's another food I can eat on days when I can't eat anything.

I was terribly IBSsy yesterday. I ate these lentils for dinner and instantly felt better. Today? IBS is gone. Love it!

Charcoal caps!!!

Is it weird to think of eating charcoal? Yeah, I thought so too. But they work really well for me. And others too. A year or so ago, my brother came to me, looking for a gas stopper. I fished some old charcoal caps out from underneath the bathroom sink. The next day? He was all like: Those charco-caps were freakin' amazing! Charcoal caps are weird, so is IBS!

Red wine

Sigh. Not gonna lie, this one's my fave. Don't you lie either! You KNOW it's my fave. HA! When IBS first struck me back in 2005, I was drinking a bottle every two nights, just to find some relief.

Granted, IBSser friends of mine have attested that abstaining from alcohol really helps cure IBS altogether. So keep that in mind. But I think that vino has a history for aiding in digestion in the culinary arts. It's culturally known as a meal accent and tummy friend - like parsley, rosemary, sage and thyme. And we can't forget what our ancestors have passed down to us...

Okay, now I'm just making shit up!

Next up - TONICS for IBS!!!

Toots

What daily practices do you take to keep IBS at bay?

How do you not let stress affect your guts?

Cured?

I've been posting for three and a half years. In that time, I've stood on this blog like a mountain. I've raised up my hands and declared many saviors of IBS.

Each time, I cry: "I'm cured!"

I'm a little over-the-top.

The truth is, the same tricks don't work for everybody. The same tricks don't work every day either.

Every morning, I feel different. Every night, there's a new concoction of sludge mixing in my tummy. It's zapped by whatever is going on in my head and heart. Sometimes, my intestines decide to take the day off. And from there... all I can do is try to keep myself from feeling bloated, dizzy and farty.

What do I mean by "cure"? First, I don't mean a tonic. Tonics are daily routines that keep IBS at bay. That's another post.

Cures are angels. On a day when I'm incredibly bloated, not digesting anything, feeling exhausted and stinky, cures hear my desperation and return my body to normalcy. Cures stop IBS in its tracks.

Let's look at these so-called "cures." Let's re-evaluate them. Have they lasted the test of time?

Going Vegan

On my thirtieth birthday, I made a vegan no-refined sugar cake. It made me horribly IBSsy for days. I learned - going vegan will not save me from IBS.

Recently I brought eggs back into my diet. My boyfriend's niece has her own chickens, and we like to support her. Now, I eat omelets a couple times a week. And guess what! No problems.

I love BIG slices of garlic on top of a swiss chard omelet!!!

Going Gluten Free

Eating gluten free IS NOT about eating whatever I want that's gluten free. Gluten free cookies are still cookies. Gluten free pizza is still pizza.

Processed food is void of nutrients and fiber. While I find myself able to eat it on occasion, my body works best when given mostly whole foods - grains, vegetables, fruits, beans, nuts, and seeds. If I do want to sneak and eat something "bad," I can once in a while. But on a regular basis? I have to take the time to cook and prepare something from scratch. And it's worth it!




White Rice

White rice is a quick fix. It is very easy to digest and instantly calms down my guts. BUT - white rice lacks fiber. So while it eases IBS in the moment, it won't help clean the pipes of whatever is causing the farts.

Peppermint

It helps, but not enough. I prefer to make a tea with basil, thyme, and parsley. It's an acquired taste. Imagine nomming on a branch of Christmas tree. Basil and thyme tea is slightly minty, with a bitter barky edge to it. Personally? I love it. It quells my farts almost instantaneously.

Psyllium

Oh lord... I still feel bad about this one. I got emails afterwards. Many of my pals found psyllium very difficult to take orally. You know what? I AGREE.

For me, psyllium is most effective when the husks are mixed in A LOT of water. Usually, I take two tablespoons in 32 ounces. Unfortunately, this is also the most uncomfortable way to take psyllium. It's like trying to swallow pencil shavings in water. Yeah, good luck with that!

While psyllium DOES work, I don't enjoy taking it. I save it for when I'm three days into a bout of IBS, with no light at the end of the tunnel and DESPERATE to feel better. Psyllium helps clean me out, but without the explosiveness of a laxative. It just makes shit happen.

Larabars

Larabars, or any homemade date bar, has become my number one go-to IBS cure. I can't tell you why it works. But it just does. Every single time. All of the above cures have been known to fail on random occassions. Larabars? Never. Never. Ever. No matter how bad I feel, and for how long, one Larabar sends instant calm into my guts.

As I've discussed before, I'm not a huge fan of the de-rawing, de-veganizing of Larabars. They were taken off the shelf during the salmonella peanut butter scare of. 09. This is why it's a good idea to make your own!!!

Homemade Date Bars

Ingredients

15 Pitted Dates

1/4-1/2 cup soaked nuts of choice

Pinch of salt

Instructions

Throw everything into food processor.

Process until smooth.

Press into tupperware.

Stick in fridge for two hours.

Cut into desired shapes.
Nom happily.

Toots

What foods calm your stomach?

Do you think there's one diet that can cure IBS?

... Or are our crappy tummies all different?

Comin' Atcha wit da Master IBS

FG-in-training, 1997

I was on a date with a guy and he wanted me to say "FartyGirl." Like out loud. We were at Starbucks. And he wouldn't let it go.

"Say it! Say it! Say it!" he chanted, like a dumb high school kid at a football game.

Literally - in that second - I knew it was never going to work out.

I tried to explain: "I like to call myself as 'FG', y'know... cos I'm a gangsta..."

"Say it! Say it! Say it!" he continued.

People were looking around. So I said it. He cried, "YEAH!" and slapped me five.

Dork.

FG, 2010

What am I doing here?

Am I relishing in the self-empowerment of dropping the F-bomb? Am I reeling you in with classic self-deprecation? Or are you truly interested in understanding how food and digestion affects the fulfilling-ness of our lives?

After three-and-a half years of posting, where am I? Who am I? What is FartyGirl?

Cheesy vegan sausage pie: What I thought was IBS-friendly, circa 2008

As I write this post, I'm watching the man I love on the porch - he's coughing through a cigarette, looking exhausted and hungover.

As I write this post, my friends are updating their Facebook statuses about their crazy monstrous kids, who ALWAYS seem to be sick with colds and stomach bugs, who ALWAYS seem to be eating hot dogs, candy, cereal, pizza, and ice cream.

Over the past three years, I've watched family and friends attempt to fix health problems through medicine, rather than diet - only to fail.

As human beings, we have free will to put whatever food we want into our bodies. But I continue to be confused as to why we choose the food we choose. We choose what tastes good, what is easy, what is popular. And - friends, family - all I ever hear is how tired and shitty everyone feels.

Kale chips: IBS-friendly, circa 2011

I started this blog because I was feeling shitty. Through reading, I learned that how I feel is directly caused by what food and drink I put into my body. By changing my sustenance, I feel better. All I want is to help my friends and family feel happy and healthy.

That's what FartyGirl means to me.

Laugh all ya want about the name.

But really? It's no joke.

Now - get ready for some Master IBS!!!

Over the next two weeks, I'll be consolidating all of my IBS posts into 3 easy-to-access guides.

I'm going to revisit all the "cures" I've "discovered".

I'm going to talk about what I do to maintain digestive health on a daily basis.

I'm going to talk about allergens, superfoods, and herbs.

I'm going to talk about what I've learned over the past six years of trials and tests.

Raw, raw, raw and RAWRRRR!




Initially, this blog was meant to be about IBS.

BUT the center of every body is the STOMACH AND THE GUTS!

So even if you DON'T have IBS,

some of this info could be worthwhile to you.

I hope it helps. I hope you like it.

Btw - Thanks to Meech for the title of this post!